Thoughts and observations on Green Arrow, classical liberalism, freedom, comic books and matters of social justice.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

With a tin cup for a chalice...

From the Florida Parrot Head Clubs website, a list of all the parrothead clubs in Florida, comes this great explanation of what is (and is not) a true Parrothead!

What is a Parrothead?

Parrotheads- (par-it-heds) n. Unique creatures found in colonies worldwide. Not particularly dangerous, they do occasionally engage in "Feeding Frenzies" that can be somewhat disconcerting to other, less social creatures. While they frequently wear very colorful and unorthodox clothing, Parrotheads have the innate ability to blend in with their environment when required and are sometimes hard to detect. The trained spotter should look for subtle clues like a coconut bra or an email address @ParrotHead.com

Parrothead: 1. noun: A rare specimen of non-conformists that is an apparently normal person that in reality is a restless dreamer and wild wanderer. Possessing a creative imagination and pure gypsy soul, their dress consists of delightful yet creative and comfortable clothing mainly of Colorful Caribbean design. Diet consists of Cheeseburgers and Margaritas.2. Noun: A devotee of the music and life style of Jimmy Buffett the originator of "Caribbean, drunk, rock-n-roll" A true sound of his own. Jimmy Buffett has found various outlets for his creativity; music and books.

We are not Parrot Heads because we are Jimmy Buffett fans.

We are Parrot Heads because:
* We love the ocean.
* We love our planet.
* We love to have fun.
* We are Parrot Heads because:
* We are not afraid to be silly.
* We are not afraid to act foolish.
* We are not afraid of love.

We are Parrot Heads because:
* We like scantily clad members of our favorite sex
* We like playing in the sun with those same members.
* We like singing songs that say all of these things.

We are Parrot Heads because:
* We believe the best things in life cannot be bought.
* We believe sharing the best things make them better.
* We believe in the innate goodness in all of us.

We are Parrot Heads because:
* We know shared joy is increased.
* We know shared pain is lessened.
* We know a good friend has value beyond measure.

It just so happens, that Jimmy Buffett sings about all these things. So, we are not Parrot Heads because we are Jimmy Buffett fans, we are Jimmy Buffett fans because we are Parrot Heads!

10 Stages of a Parrot Head

1. Jimmy Who...
Who the hell is Buffett, oh that guy who did (choose one)
a. “Margaritaville”
b. “Cheeseburger in Paradise
c. “Why don't We Get Drunk and Screw”
(Spells Buffett with one "t")

2. Oh it's with two "T's";
Buys "Songs You Know by Heart" because he heard "that one song" at a party. Starts hearing all about the wild concerts and openly declares to the world that he/she is a parrot head. Goes out and buys that
Hawaiian shirt they wanted all their life or at least since last week.

3. Look at me, I'm a parrot head.
Goes to a Jimmy Buffett concert and is amazed by all things parrothead. Loved the show but can't remember any of it through the alcoholic haze.

4. One Particular Parrot
Decide they should buy a few more albums so that the old timers will stop laughing at them when Jimmy plays "One Particular Harbor" and he/she says "that's a great song, I've never heard it."

5. Domino College
Buys the box set so they don't have to buy all the old albums and still gets laughed at or ignored because they've never heard "Migration", and "Cowboy", the good news is she/he knows "Fins" well enough to move his/her hands the right way at the concert.

6. Buffett is god
Starts collecting the albums, buys a couple more Hawaiian shirts, maybe even a coconut bra. Have two concert tees, and a subscription to the Coconut Telegraph. Suddenly has a burning need to find out all that is Buffett and considers Buffett to be god, 'though they've never heard the song "God's Own Drunk". Actually believes Buffett is a beach bum.
NOTE: Some people never get passed this stage...

7. Say it isn’t so Jimmy
Reads everything there is on Buffett and is getting a little disillusioned. They are closing their ears and screaming "say it ain't so" when people criticize their "hero". No one stays at this stage for very long they either punt return to Stage 6 or move to Stage 8.

8. Screw Buffett...
Accuse Buffett of being a heretic, Accuse him of selling out ... and all the concerts sound the same...Screw Buffett; This is also a dead end stage for many fans. Cancel subscription to CT, complains about
concerts and new records and every other money grubbing venture Mr. Margaritaville is wrapped up in; hates it when his/her non parrothead friends label him/her a parrot head.

9. My name is ...... and I listen to Buffett music.
Comes to the realization that Buffett is human, and deals with it, with the help of other Buffett fans or some internal strength. Understands the myth, and to some degree, the man who created it and finds compromise somewhere between stage 6 and stage 8; can't buy anymore albums because they have them all, already. Enjoys the music for what it represents, which is why they bought it in the first place and ignore all the other bullshit as best as possible, without forsaking their own moral standards.

10. If you reach stage nine and still continuously listen to Buffett and enjoy the concerts and the lifestyle....you, my friend, are a Parrothead.

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